As I’ve already touched on today, I have my reservations when it comes to religion. It’s a topic I’m shamefully underinformed about. I mean, I know the main things, I know the five pillars of Islam, I know why the Christians don’t like men to get sexy on each other, but my biblical knowledge is to say the least, limited.

My only experience of the bible, save for finding the creepy passion-killing Gideon’s version in hotel room bedside tables, was reading the New Testament (do you cap that?) in RE in Year 11.

We read the James I bible, and there were parts of it, I rather enjoyed. Not in a moral way — is it possible to enjoy anything in a moral way? But in a, “oh that’s nice” way. Which is the way I enjoy most things I enjoy. If that makes sense, which patently it doesn’t.

Anybollocks, Michael Gove, the puce-cheeked manchild Education Minister has decided that he is going to give every secondary school in Britain a James I bible on the 400th anniversary of the publication of the thing. Only he’s decided what the definitive English translation of the bible needs is a self-penned foreword.

No, really. Michael Gove is going to write a foreword to the James I bible.

The move has been criticised by secular societies for being a waste of money, which it clearly is. Schools are fucking chockful of bibles. My state high school — a fucking rough one at that — was swimming in them.

The thing that’s annoying about Gove is that some of his ideas are good. I don’t see that a classic educational syllablus would be a bad thing, but it has to be tempered with a grounding in practical education too.

Gove himself says how important education will be in attracting business in the future, but how many academics specialising in late Romantic literature are Google actually going to need?

Gove praises top schools like Eton and Harrow, but doesn’t realise that the social and economic backgrounds of their pupils have a far greater bearing on their success than their grades.